You land with a spare cutaway pillow 
 

You land with more than 1 main 
 

Your rigger gives you volume discounts 
 

You find nylon all over your face, and it's not your girlfriend's panties 
 

You take your cellular phone with you on a skydive and need to use it 
 

You compare line-burn scars with your friends 
 

You only jump morning and evening 

"Rap" music, to you, has a string section but no instruments 

You look down instead of up when someone screams "incoming" 
 

You don't own a jumpsuit 
 

You're the only one on the DZ wearing trousers on a hot summer's day 
 

You take more freefall after a cutaway than you do on exit 
 

You are used to landing with less than two shoes 
 

You always reply "3 seconds" before the person asking "What's the delay from.." has even got the altitude out 
 

When people ask "Why are you wearing four hook knives?" you reply "Because I can't find anywhere on this rig to fit another one" 
 

You've been told by your rigger, "No I will not modify your reserve with red 'A' lines."
 

You have a pocket for a cellular phone on your rig